


Best Gift I've Ever Gotten

by DaringlyDomestic



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Angst, Pining, Post-Reichenbach
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-10
Updated: 2018-12-10
Packaged: 2019-09-15 22:17:17
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 429
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16941717
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DaringlyDomestic/pseuds/DaringlyDomestic
Summary: prompt: Best Gift I've Ever Gotten (Johnlock)





	1. The First Year

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> John POV

~~Sherlock~~ ,

I thought the influx of messages to my blog would have died down by now. I haven't posted in over a year. You would have known they'd keep at it. Then again, you'd have also known how to make it stop. 

I can't decide which way is better. The messages are a constant reminder of ~~you and me~~... ~~our life.~~.. ~~what I've lost.~~

I can't imagine a day without them. It's stupid, I know, but it feels like if the messages stop coming, it will mean the world has ~~forgotten~~...moved on. It's a reminder that I never will. 

That's the first time I've said that outside my own head. Ella's been trying to get me to say it for months, I think. I'm not sure of much anymore. But I know this is true. I'll never forget. When I think of you, I'll always ~~think of Baker Street, arguing over severed heads in the fridge, leaning breathless against the wall in the foyer, making cups and cups and cups of tea~~... In the end, Sherlock, it was always you and me. 

Now, it's too late to tell you. I wish I'd known sooner. I wish I'd been braver. I wonder all the time if it would have changed anything. If it would have mattered. Probably not. But I can't help tormenting myself with the "what if." 

Anyway, the people from the blog are trying to distract me since it's the holiday season. Kind of them, seeing as I haven't responded to any of them all year. But someone sent me some holiday-themed asks, and one of them struck a cord: 

_What was the best gift you ever received?_

I have been thinking about that question all day. It's stuck on a loop in my head. I can't seem to shake the question no matter what I do, and ~~I can't answer because~~... I can't answer.

So, I thought I'd write it down here for you. Only for you. 

Because you were the best gift I ever got. I didn't even know you were possible, so I never thought to ask for you. But I was damn lucky to have you, even for such a short period of time. When we first met, I was broken. Hopelessly, utterly broken, but you didn't care. You never tried to fix me, and you made me feel like I didn't need to be fixed. You made me feel like I could be enough, just as I was. 

I never got to tell you that. 

I never will. 

Merry Christmas,  ~~Love~~ ,

John

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, what started as an angsty one-shot is now at least three parts. I refuse to be sorry! Someday I will write more standalone one-shots, but today is not that day.


	2. The Second Year

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sherlock POV

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a telegram which contains telegraphic coded messages. If you are not familiar (http://languagelog.ldc.upenn.edu/nll/?p=1626) may be useful.


	3. The Third Year

**Author's Note:**

> As always, what started as an angsty one-shot is now three parts. I refuse to be sorry! Someday I will write more standalone one-shots, but today is not that day.


End file.
